First of all, my Valentines day was... what's a good word? Kaputs! It was my goal to have a girlfriend By February 14th 2009! And guess who failed misserabley? Ha! ME!!! And to remind me of this failure some girl said to me as I'm leaving work "Wade, have a great day being single tomorrow!" Woah, are those fighting words? I should have punched her in the baby makes! I was so bugged! Ha! And for some reason I'm still nice to her face! Go figure!
But this is cool! (sort of) My sister hooked me up with 2 free massages at her massage school on Valentines at her work! But she thought she would be funny and hand me over to some lady who is way more of a man than I am! And stupidly I was butt naked for this massage! Long story short, I totally got a deep tissue massage on my...(don't read this mom) bum cheecks! Ha!
She was getting alittle too into it (if you know what I mean) with her heavy breathing and how she was practically sitting on me! I swore she was going to brake me in half, or worste brake the table! How embarressing would that be if the table broke and my naked body rolls out under the sheet into the next stall! Ha! i'm blushing just thinkin about the occwardness! Anywho, she makes me roll over and I have my hand over... yep! good job! you just read my mind! And she kept reasuring me that I won't get exposed, Hay-O no! I just kept telling her that my hands are cold! Ha! I know her better than that! She really likes her hands on activities!
Oh, and another thing that just made Valentines day even more special! I grew a tumor over night! My lymphnode was huge that morning! The doctor couldn't belive how big it was! First thing he says was "Are you Sexually active? Well what about the last 6 months!" After I said "no" again he gets this wierd look on his face and said "Have you had any body parts in your mouth?" Ha! Do I have 'LIAR' written accross my forhead? Because he wasn't buying it!
But what I'm getting at is, my lymphnode was so big and I felt like I should give this tumor it's own name! Because it was getting alot more attention then I ever get, and my freaky massuge was trying to drain it by using her "techniques" which ended up being bull crap! It just hurt like no other and got even bigger! I will kill my sister if I ever have to go to that lady again! Man it was misserable!
Anywho, my last uncool story of this blog is how my crapy computer made me want to poke my eyes out today! It's been quite a while since I've felt this 'un cooleo' So I found this funny movie that I wanted to show my friend Sean after class, but these 2 girls in the hall were talking as if their Shizzy life was every one's business (AKA:Really Loud) So to I turn my computer as loud as it goes to drown them out, so Sean can see these funny videos.
But for some reason, my computer wanted to take all the days to dd it's downloads and I ran out of time! LAME! So I shut my computer (which usually turns it to 'hibernate mode') and went to my 'Bad words and Taboo' terms class. This class is full of... how do I say this nice? people who like to use bad words, and they're pretty much the summiest/craziest faced people on campus! (I'm just there because I want an easy Humanities credit) So... what I'm getting at is, I just really don't want to make eye contact, or get any attention from anyone, I just want to blend in and learn the the origins of the F-word.
Anywho, In the middle of this lecture my computer finished down loading this movie and must have been proud or something? so it started playing this movie
Female Dictator
It was on the loudest setting blaring in our amphitheater classroom, for the teacher and all the students!
It's kind of like forgetting to turn your cell phone off at church or in an important meeting, but this was way loud and I didn't even know it was coming from me! So it just kept going on and on while I'm being a chatty kathy, talking the girl next to me (she's not completely insane like the rest of the folks) And the whole time I was thinking "huh, that sounds way familiar?" The only way I realised that it was coming from me, was because more and more people kept turning around staring at me! Ha! Dude, I felt like such a butt lick trying to turn it off, which it wouldn't! So I just explained that "My computer has problems! Kind of like how all you have problems!" Just kidding, I didn't say that, but I should have!
And while your watching that video, watch this one also:
Courageous Man
Well, I gotta bounce out of here, the whole time I've been typing this, some kind of powder keeps falling on my head and my black shirt! Is that nomal? Ha! Well, stay tuned for my next post called "I'm covered in Anthrax"
But this is cool! (sort of) My sister hooked me up with 2 free massages at her massage school on Valentines at her work! But she thought she would be funny and hand me over to some lady who is way more of a man than I am! And stupidly I was butt naked for this massage! Long story short, I totally got a deep tissue massage on my...(don't read this mom) bum cheecks! Ha!
She was getting alittle too into it (if you know what I mean) with her heavy breathing and how she was practically sitting on me! I swore she was going to brake me in half, or worste brake the table! How embarressing would that be if the table broke and my naked body rolls out under the sheet into the next stall! Ha! i'm blushing just thinkin about the occwardness! Anywho, she makes me roll over and I have my hand over... yep! good job! you just read my mind! And she kept reasuring me that I won't get exposed, Hay-O no! I just kept telling her that my hands are cold! Ha! I know her better than that! She really likes her hands on activities!
Oh, and another thing that just made Valentines day even more special! I grew a tumor over night! My lymphnode was huge that morning! The doctor couldn't belive how big it was! First thing he says was "Are you Sexually active? Well what about the last 6 months!" After I said "no" again he gets this wierd look on his face and said "Have you had any body parts in your mouth?" Ha! Do I have 'LIAR' written accross my forhead? Because he wasn't buying it!
But what I'm getting at is, my lymphnode was so big and I felt like I should give this tumor it's own name! Because it was getting alot more attention then I ever get, and my freaky massuge was trying to drain it by using her "techniques" which ended up being bull crap! It just hurt like no other and got even bigger! I will kill my sister if I ever have to go to that lady again! Man it was misserable!
Anywho, my last uncool story of this blog is how my crapy computer made me want to poke my eyes out today! It's been quite a while since I've felt this 'un cooleo' So I found this funny movie that I wanted to show my friend Sean after class, but these 2 girls in the hall were talking as if their Shizzy life was every one's business (AKA:Really Loud) So to I turn my computer as loud as it goes to drown them out, so Sean can see these funny videos.
But for some reason, my computer wanted to take all the days to dd it's downloads and I ran out of time! LAME! So I shut my computer (which usually turns it to 'hibernate mode') and went to my 'Bad words and Taboo' terms class. This class is full of... how do I say this nice? people who like to use bad words, and they're pretty much the summiest/craziest faced people on campus! (I'm just there because I want an easy Humanities credit) So... what I'm getting at is, I just really don't want to make eye contact, or get any attention from anyone, I just want to blend in and learn the the origins of the F-word.
Anywho, In the middle of this lecture my computer finished down loading this movie and must have been proud or something? so it started playing this movie
Female Dictator
It was on the loudest setting blaring in our amphitheater classroom, for the teacher and all the students!
It's kind of like forgetting to turn your cell phone off at church or in an important meeting, but this was way loud and I didn't even know it was coming from me! So it just kept going on and on while I'm being a chatty kathy, talking the girl next to me (she's not completely insane like the rest of the folks) And the whole time I was thinking "huh, that sounds way familiar?" The only way I realised that it was coming from me, was because more and more people kept turning around staring at me! Ha! Dude, I felt like such a butt lick trying to turn it off, which it wouldn't! So I just explained that "My computer has problems! Kind of like how all you have problems!" Just kidding, I didn't say that, but I should have!
And while your watching that video, watch this one also:
Courageous Man
Well, I gotta bounce out of here, the whole time I've been typing this, some kind of powder keeps falling on my head and my black shirt! Is that nomal? Ha! Well, stay tuned for my next post called "I'm covered in Anthrax"
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