Saturday, April 18, 2009

I owe my life to that apple!

No wonder Jonny Apple seed devoted his whole life to planting apple trees! Because they're not only awesome and nutritious , but they can be used to juggle! And you can put them on people heads to shoot with arrows! (William Tell does that for a hobby) Some of the best computers are... Apples! I even know a few Chinese people who name their kids 'Apple.' Most of my Elementary school teachers would come to school wearing little apple earings. NYC, even though I haven't been there, it's known as being 'The big apple!' So what I'm saying is, Apples are the bee's knees! But lets not forget how they save lives! Ha! (mine in particular!)

It all happend today, when I was on my way to a friend's house and I decided to grab an apple on my way out the door. This was a way juicy apple, dripping down my hands, so I had to eat it fast and make slurping noises while eating, because I didn't want it to drip all over the the car!

So I roll on up to this stop light, still eating my apple... (Quick side note) You know that feeling when you know someone is watching you? even when you can't tell who? Well I was feeling like that, so I look over at the green car next to me and it's a grandma driving, who was like 66 (possibly 68 if she ages well?) and I think she was either driving to the hospital or the morge, because the much older lady in the passager seat looked like she was well past her experation date! (107 year old)

But these too ladies were starting at me, so I turn my head and enjoy my apple out the other window! But for some reason when I catch someone looking at me, I always have to look back over and over again, just to make sure they've stopped lookin at me. So i slowly turn my head back around and they are still staring at me! I'm not sure if I was eating like a Piggy pig pig? Or if I eating all seductively, but how ever I was eating that apple, I was sure turning heads!

But they were staring at me for so long, while I was looking out the other window that we didn't even notice that the light was green, so right as I'm about to go, this speeding car comes shooting threw the intersection, barley missing me! In other words, if I had been paying attention, (not eating my apple) my car would have gone into the intersection at the same time that this LameO would have, which would have T-boning my car on the driver's side! Fewf! Thank heaven for Seven Eleven (and also for Apples!)

Sunday, April 5, 2009

What do I hate more than Chocolate cake?

More chocolate cake! Haha!
I keep getting gross chocolate cakes for my birthday. I probably look like I've enjoyed my fair share of chocolate cakes, but these love handles were earned from fries and bagel bites! Thanks for all the Birthday Wishes!
Image result for matilda chocolate cake

I am tired of being confussed with Soy Milk!

MILK, What is it good for? Absolutely Nothing! Just kidding, it's actually not that bad!

But it expires so fast! And I don't drink it that often, so it ends up expiring before I even open it! So that's why I switched to soy milk! Delicious Soy Milk, which takes a month and a half to expire.
And now, I'm getting so confused with this soy milk! It just keeps going back an forth on the healthy scale! One day I'll hear it cures everything, and the next day I'll hear that it causes all sorts of complications! I just keep going back and forth hearing the Goodies and Baddies of this mysterious milk that comes from beans!

I first found out that Soy milk reduces cholesterol! (good thing)

Next I hear that it's bad for your digestive system, and hard for your body to break down (bad thing)

Soy milk raises estrogen levels- which has made men lactate. Dude! If that's true? I'd poke my eyes out! (Defiantly a bad thing! Ha!) read on: I found a follow up article on this!

Soy milk helps reduce the chance of getting prostate cancer (The joy of Soy!)

Soy milk and soy products can really wack out your thyroid (not so good!) and that web site called me a "human guinea pig" for eating soy before it's actually been proven safe! Ha! They are Lame! Actually, now I think about it! that web site isn't even a scholarly source! So lets completely discredit them- Done! I'm no longer a human guineapig and every one now has a healthy thyroid!

Next on my list, soy milk has an abundance of isoflavones, anyone know what that is? I didn't either!~ They are chemicals that are very similar to the estrogen hormone which are connected to "the prevention of many cancers, heart disease, osteoporosis and more." read more about this at: http://coffeetea.about.com/od/health/a/soymilk.htm

Soy milk only has a quarter of the amount of calcium that dairy milk has (Osteoporosis here I come!) But it has more fiber than cow milk, and it's high in protein!

Soy milk has a little more fat than regular 2% milk, but has no cholesterol!

I kind of found out that this is a never ending list of goodies and baddies of soy milk, so in conclusion of my research, I've come realised that people who are die-hard fans for soy milk, tend to call dairy milk "Moo Moo juice!" and most sources tell me that you should drink your soy milk with in 3-5 days for it to be fresh (that's not the same as the expiration date)
Also, the Sun spoils "moo moo juice" so fast, no matter how cold it is. If it's in the sun then it'll go bad before the expiration date!

But after much debating and reading all sorts of articles, I've made my decision! I am going to (drum roll please......) Keep drinking Soy milk! Cause I've drank it for so many years, and I still don't lactate (thank goodness!); I also figured that that too much of anything is bad for you, so if I don't go over board on soy milk then I should be fine... that is until it makes my thyroid fail! Ha!

Now this guy knows what's goin on! He has fresh milk every where he goes!